His smile changed to aroma of the day. The butterflies in my stomach twittered as I wondered what the good news would be. Did he get a job clarifying another month of our bills paid? If only we could get enough extra money built up to make it a few more months. As my mind explored the options of his lingering smile, my gut reminded me of the reality of starting a business at home. We won’t be financially stable for at least a few more years, that’s even if we make it. I decided to take a leap of faith and embrace myself in the good news.
Are you as curious as I was? When he told me he got a job offer for $250 my heart sank. This was an extreme amount of money compared to when he first started making $5 orders on Fiverr, but I still expected more. He could see the disappointment on my face, and my reaction was confusing to both of us.
The one thing I miss about having an expected paycheck is stability. I never know how much is too much to spend at the store. I never know if we will have money to buy clothes if our kids need it, yet alone the money to pay our bills. My mind is searching for the same stability of our previous jobs during our journey of being entrepreneurs. I just need some peace to make me be able to breathe. My soul aches to know if our family is going to be okay.
But yet again, my mind faced the normal side of our world in thinking, God’s blessing are not enough for me. The beautiful side of our journey is that God’s blessings are enough. He can make us be relaxed in any situation. God might not pour money over our family, or flood us with materialist things, but he does pour out His love. God knows our big picture, and He knows exactly how much we need. It’s scary going along this journey, but it’s so nice to know God is on our side. So no matter how much I get disappointed by His blessings, He will still carry us through. What an amazing God we have!
Are you facing a challenging time in your life? Maybe you feel God’s blessing are not enough for you. I’ve been stuck in this place so many times, but the most helpful reminder is to look at the things around us. Maybe you’ve never noticed how grand your surroundings are. For some of you they might look slim. Whatever your situation is, just remember, it’s okay to tell God how you feel. He desires an honest relationship with us. What would happen in your life if all your blessings were taken away? Would you notice much of a difference? What are some blessings you’ve received? Let me know in the comments.